Seri sez: Rumors of my death are greatly exaggerated.

February 18, 2010

So, Jov threatened me that if I didn’t post something today she would post something AS me that would be way more embarrassing than anything I could possibly come up with on my own. Never one to back down from a challenge, I present to you:

Seri’s Dirty Little Secrets

(dramatic music)

I know it’s hard to believe it, but I was once a total noob. Granted, I’ve been playing WoW since 2004 so it was a long time ago. Still, I am reluctantly forced to admit that I wasn’t always this awesome. Don’t believe me? Evidence to the contrary:

  1. My first character ever was a Priest, but I abandoned her around level 20. I know, right? How stupid can you be?
  2. My second character ever was a Warrior. I loved dual-wielding. I also loved the Arms tree. *wince* Yeah, that’s right. I was a dual-wielding Arms warrior. I didn’t know any better!
  3. During my stint as a level 60 raiding Druid, I was probably the only Balance Druid in the game WITHOUT the Moonkin talent after its introduction. Later, I would become (probably) the only Balance Druid in the game without the Treants talent after its introduction.
  4. I once fell off a cliff accidentally, taking my whole party (on autofollow) with me. This ended the long-time debate of ‘If Seri jumped off a cliff….’
  5. Finally, just to prove that even the grizzled WoW veterans among us are still occasionally total noobs… I recently raided for 1-2 weeks with a broken meta gem bonus.

So, fess up. What was your greatest noob moment ever, and how long ago was it?



  1. Riding my Mage over the cliff to the Crater, waiting, waiting, hitting Featherfall…

    No Light Feathers. Splat. (couple of weeks ago).

    Trying to figure out why my Druid would not enter stealth (Prowl).. I was playing my Rogue. (3 years ago).

    Buying epic land riding for my Warrior at level 60.. Only to realize I did not have enough money for the 58 and 60 training skills. (4 years ago)

    • Oh the glyph for slow fall is so sweet for preventing situations like this (plus it’s a minor glyph).

  2. I was a good way into Naxx, as our guild’s OT before I learned that a second taunt; Hand of Reckoning (trainable not talent point) had been introduced…tanking progression stuff while missing a taunt, pretty noobtastic.

    Unabridged version of the story is [url=http://wowsvenn.blogspot.com/2009/05/taunt-talk.html]HERE[/url].

  3. When WotLK came out I healed Naxx for over a month using level 70 spells. (The idea of having to update my Clique bindings when I learned new ranks never occured to me).

    Also, I didn’t realise that Deterrence was no longer a SV talent and is now available to all hunters until a couple months ago.

    I can sympathize with not having the moonkin talent as a balance druid. When ugly tree form came out I avoided it like the plague for as long as I could.

  4. Off-Tanking guild progression runs through Naxx all the way to Grobby before realizing that a second Pally taunt had been introduced. (1 year ago)

    Unabridged story of that newbtastic feat:

  5. “You can put a buckle on your belt? And put a gem in it? Awesome.”

    – me, a couple months after hitting 80

    “Wait, you mean there’s a vendor where you can buy t9 with triumph badges? Where? Seriously? All the way out there? How the hell were we supposed to know THAT?”

    – me, a couple months after 3.2 dropped

  6. I love posts like this.

    -Vanilla WoW, leveling my first toon, a warrior, all the way to 45 before using talent points. I figured they didn’t mean a whole lot so I didn’t care. I still can’t bring myself to play that class. No wonder I hated it.

    -Vanilla WoW, not enchanting a dang thing on my mage even though I raided regularly.

    -Drowned several times on my druid while doing the quest for water form. I don’t know if that’s noob or not, but I think the quest seemed harder than it really was. It’s ironic, at least.

    • Yeah I never quite drowned during that quest…but I’d get close and freak out, swimming back up for air over and over (almost dying, healing, then starting all over). Until I discovered the air bubbles hehe

      Oh and my fav noob moment…just after moving some key bindings around on my mage, I somehow managed to Ice Block off my flying mount while passing through Hellfire Peninsula at 3am. Lucky for me the fall didn’t hurt of course. Unlucky for me, I landed literally right in front of the only other level 80 out there are 3am…a ret paladin…you can imagine the emote/death/emote cycle I endured (about a month ago)

  7. A dual-wielding Arms Warrior?

    /wails in dismay and runs off shrieking insanely

    • I have a dual-wielding arms warrior, too. Lv 59, to boot, though I must have gotten to somewhere around lv 40 using a sword and shield. On the other hand, this was my first ever character.

  8. Killing your whole party while they are on autofollow is just made of pure win imho, even if it wasn’t meant as such. They should just walk themselves, bunch of slackers πŸ˜‰

  9. I can think of a few.

    Dual speccing Shadow and forgetting the glyph of levitate on it (which I have on my main spec). It didn’t kill me once, not twice, not thrice but four times before I said “damn it, now I’m gonna buy that glyph.” I think I died because of it on the way to the AH too.

    Using shadow word: death on Gluth after Decimate was funny. For a second.

    A few weeks back in UP, I did not notice the tank took a turn to avoid a pack of mobs. I pulled the entire room. The tank was far out of reach already.

    I think it was in VH I once found myself so immensly fascinated by a ret pala’s healthbar, that I forgot to heal the tank. Oops.

    But the funniest moments are on a progression raid. I think my fellow guildies could still spit flames when reminded of it. Attempt #x on Thaddius, I ran to the other side of Thaddius, feeling clever about using instant heals and my awesome keybinds facilitating this practice. My charge had not changed.

    Ulduar wipes are a little more vague. I’m quite sure I once burned my whole guild at Kologarn but generally I was playing too good to be funny.
    ToC on the other hand.. ohh, if I could get an honorable kill for every player I killed with orbs at twins…

  10. I managed to fall off the side of one of those ramps in Karazhan – where the worms and the mini-curators are. I didn’t die, I used levitate. Somehow, I managed to get stuck behind a bookcase. I couldn’t get out, so I decided to hearth (lolwut). To be fair to my noob self, this was before lock portals I believe, but it still meant I tried to run back to Karazhan. By the time I got there the group had already killed Prince. Fortunately nothing dropped for me.

    I’ve facepulled Shade in there, and locked people out.

    Oh, and I’ve been in groups that have wiped to Chess.

    As leveling, I thought that spirit gear was all right for my rogue (Blizzard, to be fair, likes to put spirit on all sorts of gear pre 60 – I think the gear developers were confused or not really settled on how stats were going to work at the endgame – I present Druid level 60 tier armor with caster AND melee stats on it as evidence). I also didn’t realize Kidney Shot existed (and was in my spellbook) until 20 levels after I learned it. Did I mention I leveled using Sinister Strike with Daggers?

  11. Party: “Where’s the strudel table?”
    Me: “I clicked it, but it wouldn’t work.”
    Party: “Do it again and we’ll assist”
    Me: “What do you mean? I’ve always made the refreshment table without help before.”
    Party: “No, it takes 2 other players to click it to materialize.”
    Me: “REALLY??? Huh. I didn’t notice that…for the last 6 months.” *blush*

  12. Once I hit 80 on my priest she went discipline and became my main. I immediately joined a raiding guild and we progressed up to anubarak in togc25. I had been doing really well, never letting a tank die until things went sour for the whole raid, but I could never figure out why other discipline priests penance spells were hitting for three times as much as mine. You guessed it… I had been using the rank one spell.

  13. My first character was a priest. It took so long to level and kill things. Of course, I had been told priests in WoW were like priests in D&D, so rather than smite everything, I was hitting it with my mace. This was weeks after the game came out.

    My second character was a rogue. I really didn’t understand why Stealth was so awesome cause you couldn’t attack anything in Stealth. I now have a lower level rogue, and Stealth apparently remembers our previous relationship, because I inevitably stealth and run right smack into the things I’m trying to attack or stun or pickpocket.

    A couple of weeks ago, not having learned the lesson on Curator, Prince Malchazzar, or Gluth over the past three years, on the Twins fight in ToC, being all grrrr-ed up on black balls to be a sparkly shadowy big glowing priest of DOOM, I shadow word deathed myself to death. I guess I should be proud that I was able to one shot someone to death at least…

    Back when the new ICC 5 mans came out, we were doing the first one, and I was pondering if you could fall off, a guildmate responded you could, and I proceeded to cut a corner into thin air and fall. Of course, I didn’t die, we didn’t have a warlock, so I had to find another place to jump so I could die. And had to have the group walk me through how to get back to the instance.

    And the noob moment that almost happened on Wednesday: My husband has pretty much stopped playing WoW. Wednesday, he decides to raid. Which somehow, is very distracting to me that night. So I’m running back after dying on trash to the Marrowgar door, and I’m on auto run, and I’m watching him die on Twins in ToC, and realized in the split second where it would have been a “BAD THING” that I needed to pay attention to my own screen and stop running. Luckily, that was an averted noob moment, though a guildmate later did the same thing on the Princes.

  14. On my second trip into Kara, my group kept getting random mobs coming after us. It took ’til, oh… after Opera to figure out that my 68 or 69 Devilsaur was ass-pulling mobs.

  15. Last night, forgot to switch from dps gear (from 5-mans) to healing gear, noticed during the first raid fight due to insufficient regen, then forgot to switch gear before the next fight…

  16. Shadow priest here . . . Last night – 10 man Hodir in Ulduar – Downed Mimiron – after a couple of tries. Upon running to the next boss, phased out of shadow and guildie said over vent “wow that’s a pretty blue dress” – I still had my frost resist gear on from Hodir. (I think more than one of us did to be fair.)

  17. – First character was a dwarf hunter. Took me 38 levels (That’s Pre-BC and XP boosts) to figure out exactly why Blizzard gave me a gun. I just thought it was for ranged pulling then running up and hitting the mob with my axe. Finally, a good soul in SM Armory explained to me how the class works.

    – After finishing my Netherwing Dailies, my mount bugged out and stayed as a Netherdrake after my Orc disguise dropped, so I right clicked the Netherdrake Disguise and was promptly dismounted. The fall took long enough for me to type “Well that didn’t work out in my favor at all.” before being splattered on the charred earth of Shadowmoon below me.

  18. My very first character was a mage. Who I abandoned at lv20 because I got tired of dying so much.

    My second character was a paladin (she actually made it to 80 and I still play her on and off to this day) and I levelled her holy (to 60) because I just started with my talent points in the first tree, not knowing there were two other talent trees.. *facepalm* Once I found out about talent trees and better specs (probably around lv30) I didn’t want to respec because I didn’t want to spend the 1g…

  19. Oh god just remembered another one. This was just a little while after dual spec and the second boss in VoA came out. I got invited with my druid to a non-guild group to fill the last spot. They didn’t need a healer so I went with my newly created kitty offspec. After two wipes they agreed we needed more dps so I offered to heal with my main spec so one of the other healers could go dps and hopefully do better than my poor dps. It was going to be the last try because some people had to go. I dutifully switched spec and the tank pulled the boss. About 30 seconds into the fight I’m out of mana. Pop innervate. 30 seconds later I’m out of mana again and the party wiped shortly after.. realised I had forgot to switch gear and was still in cat gear with a mana pool of about 4k… I totally died of embarrassment!

  20. Hitting blink instead of Molton Armor in ZA while standing in front of Zul’jin… while your main tank is polymorphed into a frog to torment you since he had found Mojo that night and you were on your 1 millionth stick trying to get him to no avail…. causes ugly wipes. I havn’t lived that one down to this day, two guilds later.

  21. However watching a frog trying to tank Zul’jin was most amusing from the floor.

    • I was on my slow flyer high above Shadow Moon Valley and had just bought my new fast flyer, being one of the first in my guild to amass a huge sum of 5k gold. I went to link it guild chat and plummeted to my death.

  22. Well, the most noobish of things was several weeks after the game came out, I was playing an undead mage and quested my way to 22 before asking in Guildchat what exactly “Crossroads” was.
    “It’s on the other continent.”
    “There is another continent?”
    “Yeah you can take the zeppelin…”
    “You mean the zeppelin gets you to other places?”

    Yeah well, that and the fact I kept Mail and leather gear because I thought mages would learn to wear it later…
    And of course getting to level 17 on my hunter without a pet and fighting on him in melee… yeah well…

  23. My priest didnt carry a weapon til level 45. I figured since I didn’t hit things I didn’t need it. I didn’t realize it would boost my stats. I was one confused noob

  24. Just this weekend I ran a random heroic on my Hunter with my fishing pole equipped.

  25. I was running heroics for about 2 months after hitting 80 and hadn’t trained since 75 😦 Wondered why I didn’t have heroic throw :p

    Once in naxx – My cat ran over my keyboard and hit the walk button, but I had no idea why on heigan I couldn’t move faster 😦 I kept blaming a slow buff! πŸ˜€

  26. Spending 2 hours (literally) running to every weapon trainer on the planet trying to find the one that would teach me how to use a bow. On my level 14 paladin. This was closely followed by running through Loch Moden to Wetlands, falling off cliff, being eaten by an ooze and spending 3 hours trying to rez…because I didn’t know how to use the spirit rezzer. (And, yes, that was my first toon, lol.)

  27. I MISS YOU COME BACK!!!!!!!!!!!! 😦 sad face

  28. When WotLK came out, I recognized the new totem mini-bar for Shamans (Shamen?) but couldn’t figure out how to drop 4 at once. Kept trying different options, before reading on Wowhead about the new “Call of” spells from trainers… so obvious…

    Once in VOA I tried to step in as an offheal in my offspec and was throwing out level 1 riptides. I had never upgraded the offspec.

  29. I started playing wow in Feb after vanilla first came out.

    My first character was a night elf hunter (obviously). I died for the first time and somehow managed to change my camera view simultaneously. I thought that the resulting featureless void was what happened when you died. I ran around staring at the sky and running into unseen obstacles for hours trying to find my body

    I almost quit playing. πŸ™‚

  30. My first toon was a mage. I didn’t know there were trainers outside of the starting area and I didn’t know about talents. I got to level 16 without any talents or new spells. Died so much I just quit for like 2 years.

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